25 Nov 2009

A New Moon Review? Bite Me.

As 90% of recent Facebook status's have probably told you, New Moon is out. I went to see it on the first day of it's release with a couple of close friends and I have to say, having not read the book mind, I was amazed by it. I think something the Twilight saga has going for it, is that it's more than just one story, in this movie alone there is a bonding between Bella Swan (human female) with the elusive, silver-detesting Jacob Black (puppydog), and there is the loss and regain of her first and everlasting love, the Cullster (undead).

I have to say, Bella is EXTREMELY misfortunate in her choice of guys, first love was a Vamp, second was a Wolf boy, both of which were constantly saying how much they could potentially 'hurt' her (kinda creepy if you ask me), I'm awaiting the moment we discover she has been concealing a long distance romance with a freaky alien peep from the Fourth Kind, to be fair they're only a tad more conceited than the Cullster (I am...God).

This was a cinema experience, so every needless moment was filled with teenage females fangasming, 'IT'S RATED 12-A *woots and wails*'. It was rather amusing when either Jakey or the Cullster exhibited any amount of flesh, as it was always immediately followed by a deafening squeal from hormone ridden teenage girls with the deepest desire to be Jakey's bitch or the Cullster's...victim?, shortly followed thereafter by a long drawn sigh from the fellas, me being an exception obviously (Jakey is OH SO hot! I would let him do me doggiestyle...And they called it Puppy Lo-o-o-ove (8)...He's much hotter than Vampy, when he took his top off my eyes were drawn IMMEDIATELY to the fact that he had one nipple bigger than the other. Ew.).

Which brings me to the point, Team Jacob or Team Cullen. Well, Vampires are ultimately cooler...I mean, there are very few ways to kill them, they sparkle in the sunlight and their hair seems to be naturally gelled. They're stylish, fast, and incredibly beautiful from an 'Emo' perspective. However, judging between Edward Cullen and Jacob Black gives a different result, Edward is SOOO clingy it is unbelievable, he may be conventionally beautiful and what have you, but seriously, having this guy watch you while you're sleeping, it's more than the slightest bit creepy, and he's overly corny too 'If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't want to live, you are my breath, I eventually want to make you suffocate so I can spend eternity with your rotting corpse', that sounds like the Cullen intentions to me. Jacob, he's hot, he's cute, he's wearing just shorts and trainers for the majority of the film, enough said.

After searching a bit within the Blogosphere. I found a suitable image for this blog created by necros900 on DeviantArt.

Look at it and laugh!

Live long and be safe.

Hugwhore <3


  1. omg...sexy foto... i saw dis. :) errrmm,,,m its just . AWESOME. much.

    its loved muchly by me and i cried LOADS
    at loads of different parts:L x

  2. I noticed that Jacob - Taylor Lautner - has one nipple bigger than the other!
    i oculdnt stop starring at it throughout the film...

    and Kane since i wa sin teh same showing of this i was one of those girls screaming XD